Getting Over the Hump(hries)

On Halloween, Kris Humphries learned he married a witch. His inadvisable marriage to Kim Kardashian lasted a scant 72 days before she filed for divorce, which was just slightly more time than the E! special on their nuptials aired for. There are probably wedding presents she hadn't even opened yet.

You might as well go ahead and eat that saved piece of cake in the freezer, Kris. At least the dessert, unlike your wife, is sweet and has layers. Enjoy the treat because unfortunately, you got tricked.

Here's a fun fact: As of October 31, the lockout had lasted 51 more days than their matrimony - or, as Kim spells it, "matrimoney."