Macaroon Five

Metta World Peace is always willing to field questions and it appears he had Mrs. Fields on his mind when addressing Spurs coach Gregg Popovich's prowess. "I just know he draws up plays where he could have five old ladies after they eat 14 boxes of chocolate chip cookies. He'll put them on the court, and they'll win. That's how good Popovich is*," Peace praised. We agree. Heck, Popovich could probably do it using oatmeal raisin (gotta make sure those grannies are getting enough fiber). The key ingredient is shortening, which is also what the Spurs are doing to the Lakers postseason.

*We hope Pop baked an extra special batch for Tim Duncan's 37th birthday yesterday.

Talking Sit

It's a good thing that during our extended break* we didn't miss much, like the Wizards breaking the curse that caused their dirty dozen game start to the season or defeating the defending champs, Rajon Rondo snapping his 10-plus assists streak at 37 games after snapping at Kris Kardashian Humphries over an ordinary foul on KG, Charles Barkley broadcasting a game, the Bobcats already equaling their win total from all of last year, the Garden being fertile ground for the Knicks who are 7-0 at on home soil (maybe because J.R. Smith is now more committed to his ballclub than clubbing), Tony Parker and Tim Duncan's going black op on a Halloween photo op, and a new name that New Orleans will come to egret - whoops, we mean regret.

But the most significant story of all was David Stern fining the Spurs a quarter of a million dollars for the coach Gregg Popovich's choice to sit Duncan, Parker, Manu Ginobli and Danny Green in the final contest of a six-game road. Popovich has put this plan in place plenty of times before, but never so early in the season and not when scheduled to play nationally televised game, which is what caused the commissioner to have a conniption.

Stern asininely attempted to argue that the franchise had done a disservice to the fans attending. It was an away game, so he means Miamians, who are noted for feeling about pro sports the way the water on their beaches does: luke-warm. These are the same fortunate fans whose team won the most recent title. The lucky bastards backers who have the privilege of "witnessing" the greatest player in the league on nightly basis, plus Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh and Ray Allen.

With his stiff sanctions, Stern showed that in the association, there's not only no rest for the wicked, there's no rest for the wonderful, either (San Antonio is 14-4). Popovich restrained response to repercussions was that he was "disappointed." Rightly so, since this unprecedented, pricey penalty shouldn't sit well with the Spurs.

*Let's just say the torpor was due to turkey day, after which we couldn't put our big-boy pants on (Kobe's advice to "just adjust" didn't work on our belt) - or make our way to a keyboard (we blame a kilo of key lime pie for the latter).

Spurs Doing the Nasty

Unless you count Manu Giboli going to the ground as he hit a buzzer-beating three to end the first quarter, the Spurs still haven't fallen in the 2012 playoffs. Talking to his team during a timeout in the fourth quarter - and wearing a microphone so those at home could hear him, too - coach Gregg Popovich exhorted, "I want some nasty!" The Spurs obliged, responding with a 39-point final frame. Manu Ginobli (26 points) was slashing like he was Freddy Krueger*. Tallying his highest output of this postseason, Ginobli caught lightning in a bottle against the Thunder, who had surrendered that many points in a quarter on only one other occasion this season.

"Nasty?" We're not so sure the adjective applies. The highest scoring team in the playoffs - and number two throughout the regular season - is offensive in just one sense of the word. The Spurs aren't a mean bunch, but they mean business. They push each other, not their opponent. They take open shots instead of cheap shots. They aren't a dirty group, but they do the dirty work. They absorb charges, make the extra pass, and - most critically of all - listen to their coach, even when he's being critical (in this instance, Popovich was rallying his troops, not ripping them). They make nasty look nice.

*the Thunder can't fall asleep on defense against him.

The Pop-ular Vote

Just because this blog will never win awards (unless "Least Read" is a category), doesn't mean we can't hand out accolades to others. Unlike the Chinese, we'll stop short of building a bronze statue for the honorees.

Coach of the Year: Gregg Popovich. The extra 'g' is for "great," which is what San Antonio has been under his guidance. He has the lockout figured out, winning the title last time there was one and quietly steering the Spurs to the second seed in the West. Selective sitting senior starters has been a Socratic - and successful - strategy.

Defensive Player: Dwight Howard. Serge Ibaka rocks the block, but no player changes more shots - or his mind - more than Dwight Howard. First in rebounds per game, third in rejections. Numbers don't lie, even if he does about not advocating for Stan Van to be canned.

6th Man: Lou Williams. It's a hard choice to deny James Harden, since his ppg is slightly higher than Williams, but no other player in the league leads his team in scoring while coming off the bench like Lou and, unlike Harden, he hasn't started a single game.

Most Improved: Nikola Pekovic. Jeremy Lin was positioned to win this in a Lin-dslide, but then a left knee injury ended his season early, so we penalized him for Lin-ping to the finish line. In his second season, Pekovic's minutes have doubled and he's responded by more than doubling his scoring (13.5) and rebounding averages (7.0). Bravo, man from Montenegro.

Rookie of the Year: Kyrie Irving. "Kyrie" means 'Lord' in Greek and he has fittingly been a God among mere mortals, whether it's other first-year players or his teammates. Now, he can use this honor to lord it over them.

MVP: Kobe Bryant. Last year's bestowal of it on Derrick Rose is what we'd call "Bulls-shit." The Adidas ads bragged that he was "fast" and he sure pulled a fast one on the voters. Like a pre-pubescent prince, Rose was crowned too early. Honestly, we almost gave up on the association, like Lamar Odom appears to have. While LeBron James is averaging career-highs in field goal percentage and rebounds, the Heat have cooled off considerably after the All-Star break. Rajon Rondo likely won't be mentioned, but we believe he should be in the discussion for responding to tiresome trade talks with triple-doubles. Chris Paul deserves a nod for ensuring the Clippers were worthy of the cover stories and commendation that came their way in the pre-season. Kevin Durant belongs among this consummate clique, but he has heaps of help (see: runners-up in the defensive player and 6th man categories) If there was backlash against LeBron for "The Decision" among voters, surely Dwight Howard will face some for the indecision he became synonymous with. That leaves Kobe Bryant. Saddled with a soft, strange team that sent away his steadying influence in Derek Fisher, Kobe scored enough to lead the league, while also showing he can be a sympathetic teammate. He's supported a shell-shocked Pau Gasol and a short-circuiting Andrew Bynum, not to mention brushing aside the bizarre Metta World Peace and the blunt Matt Barnes. The Lakers would be lost and much closer to last without him. He held his tongue when new coach Mike Brown benched him and Odom was dealt at a discount to the champs, so when the regular season ends in ten days, Kobe should be holding the MVP trophy.