Tom Benson, owner of the New Orleans Saints - who in light of recent events should seek sponsorship with Bounty paper towels - has taken the Crescent City's NBA franchise off the league's meddling hands, purchasing the club for $338 million, proving in a place known for its po' boy, he's not one of them. However, he wants a new name for a fresh start, which means exterminating "Hornets," since that's a leftover from the team's time in Charlotte. Since the team was relocated a decade ago and spent two of those years in Oklahoma City, we doubt anyone will be mad as a Hornet about it. Benson already has the Orkin man on the phone. "We'd like to change it tomorrow," he told the Times-Picayune. Here are our suggestions for a sobriquet that reflects the Louisiana city:
New Orleans Beads
New Orleans Bourbon Street Binge Drinkers
New Orleans 9th Ward, with new coach Charlie Ward
New Orleans Fatty Mounds of Dough Not Named Glenn Davis
New Orleans French Fourth Quarter
New Orleans Who Dats - No, Seriously, Who the Hell Are These Players?
New Orleans Cash Money Records
New Orleans Benson, with new coach Robert Guillaume
New Orleans Levees
New Orleans Hurricanes
New Orleans Evacuees
New Orleans FEMA Failures
New Orleans Accidental Oilers*
Or the team could reclaim it's original name, which was absurdly appropriated and remind people that Utah isn't the epicenter of jazz (or much of anything, certainly not an African-American musical movement; Utah, accept your reputation for catering white folks' hobbies, such as skiing and film festivals).
*too soon on those final five?
No comments:
Post a Comment