Puffy and Pass

Here's what we liked about All-Star Saturday:

Chase Budinger taking a feed from Puff Daddy and flying over him to flush it to open the Slam Dunk Contest and affirm that white men can jump...over short (not Jermaine Dupri short) rap impresarios. The only thing that would've made the jump better was if it was over Kriss Kross. Congratulations to another unexpected Jeremy - Jeremy Evans - who pleaded to be included by posting videos of himself hopping on YouTube, then proceeded to win it, Jazzing up a jump by donning a Karl Malone uniform, then hurdling Kevin Hart dressed as a mailman. Paul George glowed, but then he glowered in the days after, insulting the fans' intelligence - this from the guy who called Larry Bird "Larry Brown" before his last dunk - and criticized the competition. Well, Furious George, the weekend is for the fans and fans deserve to cast the deciding votes, which they did for the first time. Still, for a leap year, the Dunk Contest was a disappointment.

The elder statesman prevailing in the Skills Challenge. The third time was the charm for Tony Parker, who came in last the previous two times he participated. Kyrie Irving might've showed some of his fatigue from Friday, when he was the MVP of the Rising Stars game (swishing all 8 of the 3-point attempts), finishing at the back of the pack. We must point out that Parker is a decade older than Irving.

The trio of tie-breakers. There was one in the Skills Challenge and a duo of draws in the 3-point shooting contest, which prompted players to give a greater effort and made the events more competitive. Anthony Morrow's retro Nets jersey wasn't just a throwback, it was a tribute to the late Drazen Petrovic. There aren't a lot of Nets worthy of being honored, so kudos to Morrow for knowing the franchise's history. For older fans, it was a trip(le) down memory lane.

Few Min for Lin

If you saw the celebrity game, which kicks off All-Star weekend, and expected to see stars, you feel cheated (ironically, Common is one of the more famous folks). If you took in the Rising Stars game that followed on Friday night, you feel similarly swindled. Jeremy Lin played under 9 minutes, which was less than any of the other 18 rookies and sophomores who participated. Blake Griffin played a tick over 10.5, meaning the two most popular players people were tuning in to watch spent the least amount of time on the floor, which floored us. At least Griffin gets to showcase his skills in the All-Star game as well, so resting him was somewhat reasonable - although it's not as if there's any expectations on defense during these exhibitions - but there is no acceptable explanation for making an exception by including Lin late and then burying him on the bench. He did hoist a lovely lob to Griffin early on; who knew that would be his only highlight of the night? If this is Lin's 15 minutes of fame, we want him to at least be granted 15 minutes of playing time.

The All-Star game will be on at the same time as the 84th Academy Awards. We know those audiences likely don't have much overlap, but moving the game back to the late afternoon when it used to be broadcast (and on a national network, instead of cable where far fewer eyeballs will gaze at it) would've eliminated the conflict, thus not forcing viewers to choose between Moneyball and basketball. For us, it's no contest; the only Oscar we're familiar with is Robertson (well, and the Grouch).

The Most Linteresting Man in the World

After playing in two nationally televised games (with mixed results) and an array of articles about the once mysterious man, you may think you know who Jeremy Lin is. Well, think again. Then, think a third time and you'll be ready for our profile.

Favorite food: Linguine
Celebrity crush: Lindsay Lohan (in the '90s it was Lindy Crawford)
Favorite comic strip character: Linus from Charlie Brown
Favorite comic book character: The Lincredible Hulk
Favorite operating system: Linux*
Favorite video game console: Lintendo
Favorite video game character: Link from Zelda
Favorite TV game show: Whose Lin is it, Anyway?
Favorite current TV show: Diners, Drive-Lins and Dives
Favorite classic movie: Rear Lindow
Favorite contemporary movie: Lin Time
Favorite store: Linens 'n Things
Favorite U.S. city: Lincoln, Nebraska
Favorite Canadian city: Linnipeg, Manitoba
Favorite state (tie): North CaroLina and South CaroLina
Favorite foreign country: Lindonesia
Favorite place to visit in NYC: the Statue of Linberty
Favorite school subject: Linguistics
Favorite U.S. president: William McLinley^
Favorite quote: "Now is the Linter of our discontent." - Shakespeare
Favorite band: Linkin Park
Favorite book: The Linvisible Man
Favorite animal: the lynx because it's so linber#.

*Thought it would be Lindows 7, didn't you?
^Abraham Lincoln was too obvious for an man of his Lintellect, who has an appreciation for our overlooked 25th Commander-in-Chief.
#You wondered how we would fit in that final Lin pun. It felt forced, like Spike Lee wearing Lin's Harvard jersey.

Just for Kicks

Allen Iverson's spirit is in the same sorry state as his savings: broke. He doesn't have the change to pay for his chains, owing a jeweler over $850,000 and basketball in the U.S. has turned its back on him; even though he's willing to work his way up through the D-League, only a U.S. territory (Puerto Rico) has shown a shred of interest in his services. He's either hesitant to go because NBA scouts aren't about to travel to San Juan to see him or all he knows about the archipelago he learned from the West Side Story song "America" (he's especially leery of the "always the money owing" lyric) At his last three pit stops - Philly (again), Memphis and Turkey - he's been pitiful and petulant. He recoils from a reduced role like an A-list actor. Since every NBA team has taken a hands-off approach to A.I., maybe it's time he take one too, and switch sports... to soccer.

Enter: The Rochester Lancers, an indoor soccer team, that has officially and publicly offered him a contract for the team's remaining 2 games at $20K per, plus a bonus of $5K per goal should Iverson find the back of the net. They're also including a cut of merchandise sales, which we're sure total in the two figures. As an added incentive, the Lancers promise to house Iverson's friends and family, making us wonder if they remember how Iverson had a reputation for a populous posse in his heyday.

We think The Answer should answer the call. Don't dismiss the MISL member's proposal. Kick around the idea. $40K+ for about 3 hours worth of work (we assume they'll excuse him from practice) is a decent deal. The Lancers, who we think are in a playoff push (it's hard to tell since the league consists of 7 teams), will foot the bill, so all Iverson has to do is put his best foot forward. We hope to see him in uniform on Wednesday against Wichita. The way we see it, Iverson's life is messy, so he might as well adopt the game of Messi.

Look What the Bobcats Dragged In

It appears Michael Jordan's sports birthday wish came true (no, not the one where he's a scratch golfer or the one where he's a .300 hitter). The day he celebrated his 49th year on Earth, the owner of the blighted Bobcats saw his team's distinctly unsweet 16-game slide mercifully expire. Game on in Ontario for first-year player Bismack Biyombo, who tallied career-highs in rebounds (13) and blocks (7) against the Raptors. Rookie Kemba Walker, who scored 14 points, said, "It's been awhile (more than a month, as we pointed out in the previous post). We're overdue." Yup, like a late library book.

Unfortunately, as all awful things eventually end, so too do all awesome things, and we must mournfully mention that the Knicks Lin streak is over. Unexpectedly, New York lost at home to the horrid Hornets, owners of the second-worst record in the league, but it wasn't because of a poor performance from Lin. He tied a game-high with 26 points (Amare Stoudemire also scored 26) and added four steals and 5 assists, although he did turn the ball over 9 times. Coach Mike D'Antoni went with a tight 8-man rotation and Lin's teammates were of almost no assistance; Tyson Chandler was the only other Knick to reach double-digits , with 10 points. Contrast that with the Hornets, who had every starter score 12 or more points. We're not Linconsolable about the loss, but we are coming around to the concept that he's not Linvincible after all.

If Carmelo is still sidelined on Sunday, the Knicks might be Lincapable of defeating the Mavs, who are riding a six-game winning streak (second to the Spurs), after erasing a 15-point deficit on the road against the steady 76ers, holding Philly to a stingy 8 points in the third quarter (Dirk Nowitzki made 5 baskets in the third; the Sixers team, 4).

Finally, the third time was the charm for LeBron, as in his contrite third trip back to his old club he amassed a game-high 28 points in just 30 minutes of work, as the Heat burned the Cavs. You could say he put on a clinic in Cleveland. Lin has been the man in Manhattan, but Friday James reminded us why he's the King.

Making HeadLINes

Here's what you might've missed while watching the Lincomparable Jeremy Lin record a career-high 13 assists in leading the Knicks to their season-best 7th consecutive win:

The Spurs stretched out the league's longest winning streak to nine games, but they understand why the spotlight is shining elsewhere. "There's no bigger story than Jeremy Lin right now. I'm happy for him. [...] You want him to make every shot," said
Tony Parker, who torched Toronto for 34 points and 14 assists. Manu Ginobli, in his third game back after missing a month due to a broken hand, had 11 points and was equally gracious about the Linsation sweeping the nation, "I think New York deserves all the attention [...] They draw attention from me: The New York game finishes and I go to see what they did."

Meanwhile, the Bobcats are playing like a bunch of pussies. The return of D.J. Augustin wasn't enough to prevent Charlotte from falling for the 16th straight time. Paul Silas couldn't even pronounce the name of a player who pushed them around, Nikola Pekovic (he called him "Pep-a-vich" in his post-game comments), who posted 21 points and 11 rebounds. Cat got his tongue, perhaps? The Bobcats haven't won in over a month (their last victory was January 14). Their seasons is officially a catastrophe.

Elsewhere, Kyrie Irving returned from a concussion and scored a game-high 22 as the Cavs beat the Pacers; Kevin Martin recovered from his first scoreless game since his rookie season to pour in 32 points and help the Rockets hang on at home against the Thunder; and Ryan Anderson rained threes, connecting on 7 of 10 attempts, in the Magic's win over the 76ers. Anderson leads the NBA in three-pointers made, yet after the game, crabby coach Stan Van Gundy criticized Anderson for his lack of rebounds.

Lest we forget to Linform you, on Sunday, Lin and the Knicks will appear in a nationally televised game against the defending champion Mavericks on ABC at 1 p.m. If Obama is following him (the President loves a well-executed bailout), you should be too.

Bromantic Gesture

Q: What did we get our sweetheart for Valentine's Day?

A: Why, LINgerie, of course!*

Q: Is that all?

A: Nope, we also bought her a dozen Derrick Roses.

*And by LINgerie, we mean a Jeremy Lin jersey. Even if she breaks up with us, we're confident she'll give the jersey back, so at least we'll have a gift to console ourselves with.

Waiting for an Linvitation

There is a glaring omission from Rising Stars Challenge (formerly known as the Rookie-Sophomore game) on February 24, which pits first and second-year players against each other: Five-game phenom Jeremy Lin. He's an overnight sensation, but he can not - and should not - be overlooked, when the NBA's best convene in Orlando in 11 days. The league must find a way to Linclude him.

Celebrity coaches Shaq and Charles Barkley, never shy about sharing their opinions, need to lobby on Lin's behalf. As does his Knicks teammate and participant (and study buddy) Landry Fields. No one will tune in to see Tiago Splitter or Gordon Hayward, to name two of the second-year players selected, but fans would watch to see Lin square off against John Wall again or Ricky Rubio for a second time or take on rookie of the year front-runner Kyrie Irving. What fan wouldn't be excited by the prospect of Lin lobbing to Blake Griffin? And with Griffin wavering on whether he'll defend his dunk title, the NBA could use another player people passionately pay attention to.

Lin doesn't just prompt fans to rise from their seats, he fills seats, too. He helped sell out a T-Wolves game on the road, giving Minnesota its largest crowd since 2004, so the stands in Orlando would likely be at capacity for a secondary contest. Lin has scored more points in his first four starts than an player since the NBA-ABA merger in 1976. The league must find a way to Lincorporate him in the All-Star Weekend festivities. We don't want to see him on camera, we want to see him on the court If it's asking too much to place him in a game in which the participants have already been determined, at least Linsert him into the Skills Challenge competition. Maybe we've gone Linsane in the membrane, but we'd watch him criss-cross dribble through cones and bounce pass into buckets and be curious to compare how well he does it with Chris Paul and Russell Westbrook.

Adding Lin doesn't even have to come at the expense of removing another player from the Rising Stars roster; make an exception for a player who lately has been as exceptional as anyone in the league. David Stern, extend an invite, we Linsist.

Put Him Lin, Coach

A Harvard-educated Asian-American has been making an impact for an NBA franchise - not as an executive, but as a player. Undrafted second-year guard Jeremy Lin, plucked off of waivers from Houston has become a big deal in the Big Apple, navigating the nicked-up Knicks to three straight wins, two without Carmelo and Amare. He's put the 'lin' in "linchpin," holding the team together in a turbulent time, while providing jaded Knicks fans something to be jubilant about. 25 points and 7 assists off the bench against the Nets was enough to earn him a start and Lin responded with an even better effort: 28 and 8. Since third time's the charm, Lin then went toe-to-toe with last year's number one overall pick, John Wall, and posted a double-double, with 23 and 10. Lin's shot selection was savvier than Wall's (9-14, compared to 12-21), so maybe he deserves his own dance - although he does have a special, scholarly handshake with Landry Fields.

Mike D'Antoni, who admitted he was "afraid" to play Lin, is on the hot seat, so he might as well stick with the hot hand, making sure to shake it as thanks, should it save his job. "I'm riding him like Secretariat," D'Antoni said after Lin's first start. There you have it, straight from the horse's mouth. Lin's already joined the lofty likes of LeBron, in becoming the lone player since King James in 2003 to score 20-plus points and dish out 8 or more assists in his first two starts.
In a word, he's been Lincredible.

It's been a wild, wonderful week for Lin and it'll be capped by a prime time national showcase at home against the Lakers. His highest scoring game as a rookie (13 points) with Golden State came against the Lakers and his matchup is favorable, as should have no trouble flying by the fossil known as Derek Fisher or breaking down backup Steve Blake. So, "Linsanity," as his ascent has been dubbed, should Lin-ger.

Lin is living out his dream - except the whole crashing on his brother's couch part - and in case your dream is to attend his alma mater, he's helpfully produced a guide to gaining acceptance. We always suspected our small spectacles were holding us back. Thanks for reminding us the path to success isn't always a Lin-ear one.

Will Ferrell's Not INTROverted

In New Orleans shooting a movie, Will Ferrell announced the starting lineups for the Bulls and Hornets last night - inserting funny, fake facts about the players (although his assertion that Joakim Noah is a "terrible dancer" has been scientifically proven) - and demonstrated that, as an emcee, he's better than a Semi-Pro. After hearing who was suiting up for New Orleans, Ferrell might as well have called them The Other Guys. It's fair to say we were Bewitched by his vocal work. The game itself turned out to be a laugher, as Chicago won by 23 points. Afterwards, a lovelorn Derrick Rose went back to his hotel room, popped in a DVD and watched Ryan Gosling romance Rachel McAdams for the thousandth time.