To LeBron, Everything's Black and White

While Ron Artest was out racing cars, LeBron was busy playing the race card on CNN Wednesday with attractive anchor and most multicultural person on the planet, Soledad O'Brien. I didn't think LeBron was a coward for departing his hometown team after years of preaching loyalty (although that does make him a hypocrite) or for not being appreciative of his former teammates, which depressed Mo Williams (probably because he knew he'd never get an open look at a 3 again), or for shirking the responsibility of carrying a squad, but he is a coward for blaming the backlash on prejudice and even more so for having no evidence to support his statement. And even more so for letting his manager, Maverick Carter, mostly speak for him on the subject. Well, that was more moronic than cowardly.

"It's always, you know, a race factor," LeBron said. It's an absolute, yet a vague one. If it was always about race, then shouldn't it be black people upset with LeBron because he didn't select a city with a higher black population, like Washington D.C. or Atlanta? (Miami-Dade County is over 77% white). Last time I looked into an average crowd at an NBA game, the stands are fairly monochromatic and they're not the same shade as LeBron. It's not just one race that loves the NBA (even if it's usually one race that can afford to attend games).

His decision to imply that racism is the reason he has been criticized, especially when one of the most outspoken detractors has been Charles Barkley (with even the ever-neutral Michael Jordan questioning LeBron's choice), is far worse than "The Decision" was.

Take this mental note: Let your game do the talking because your mouth is doing some serious damage to your reputation.

'Melo Involved in 4-Way?

No, we're not referring to a scenario that might make Wilt Chamberlain smile upon 'Melo from Heaven. We're talking about a possible trade involving Denver, New Jersey, Utah and Charlotte, with Carmelo landing on the Nets.

Multiple sources have been reporting for months that Anthony has requested out of the Mile High city and his desired destination is the Knicks, so this deal wouldn't be granting his wish exactly. It would be like if in Big, Tom Hanks was turned from a boy into a teenager, instead of an adult.

If the trade is made, 'Melo, try to think of Newark as New York if you squished the letters together and changed the spelling slightly and removed everything great about New York. We understand going to the Nets means you won't play with a prestigious player (Amare), but on the bright side you'd be surrounded by big men who went to some of the most prestigious universities in the country: Brook Lopez (Stanford), Troy Murphy (Notre Dame) and Brian Zoubek (Duke). Still, even if you're not moving to a better team, at least you're transferring to a better time zone. We all know Mountain Standard sucks.

Warriors Make Smart Move

The Golden State Warriors new owners are set to relieve Don Nelson of his coaching duties and pass the clipboard to assistant Keith Smart. Smart coached the Cavs for almost half of a season back in 2002-03. The good news is he won more games than the man he took over for. The bad news is that total was 9.

Contrast that resume with Nelson's, who's won more games than anyone in NBA history and been a head coach for over three decades.However, Nelson has zero championships to show for his efforts. In contrast, Phil Jackson has 237 less victories, but more rings than he has fingers). Nelson was so disinterested in D that I wouldn't be surprised if he told his players to call him "On."

However, Nelson's record won't stand for long if Pat Riley, the Gordon Gekko of the league*, seizes control of this Brotherhood of the Traveling Shorts^ Heat squad for a few seasons.

Nelson, in the final year of his contract, will receive his fully salary. So, just like another Nelson who's been around a long time, he'll have the last laugh.

*This is in no way a concealed advertisement for Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps, starring Shia LeBeouf. In theaters now. Rated PG-13.
Two points: 1. I'm sad that I spelled Shia's name correctly on the first try, but not as sad as I am that I took the time to check to see if I did. 2. "Money Never Sleeps" would've been a great slogan for the NBA.
^Don't even try to trademark this. It's my phrase.

Reading is Pundamental

Now that Rasheed Wallace is retired -- with the Celtics replacing him with every O'Neal short of Tatum -- and the NBA season is around the corner, he's going to need an activity to occupy his time and it can't be coaching, since he erupts so often he should be classified as an active volcano. Writing a book about his 15 seasons in the league seems like a good idea. He's always been curt with the media, so this would be a chance to open up. While we expect the chapter on off-season conditioning to be no more than a page, we're sure he has plenty of stories to tell. He'll need a title for his tome. Here are some suggestions:
Technical Issues
He Said, 'Sheed Said
It Was a Good Game. Both Teams Played Hard. But I Kind of Coasted.
Let Your Scowl be Your Umbrella
The Need for 'Sheed
Ain't Nobody's Beard Better: Double-Doubles and Double Negatives
How to Succeed in Basketball without Really Trying
That's All 'Sheed Wrote
Ball Don't Lie, But Tim Donaghy Did
One Pissed Piston (or One Ticked Celtic)
Bad Things Come in Threes (co-written with Antonie Walker)

Yao's Better Half

Imagine every day you go to work, which is only for half of the year, is a half-day. And you don't have to work on consecutive days. And you'll be paid over $16 million for this light labor. Such is the relaxed schedule for Yao Ming, as the Houston Rockets announced they will play him no more than 24 minutes per outing this coming season. And Yao will sit on the second night of back-to-back games. The team might as well build a special bench to accommodate his 7'6" frame. Maybe it can recline, so he can truly rest his brittle bones. Yao missed all of last season and the Rockets finished 2 games above .500.

The Rockets created this plan in order to protect the injury-prone Yao, but by enacting this rigid rule it seems more like they are babying him. In order to make an impact, Yao will have to transform into one of the most efficient players in the league and be able to do a lot in a little time. That may not be realistic. Big men typically need time to establish a rhythm during a game and Yao is no exception. We doubt those 24 minutes will be played consecutively, meaning his flow will be worse than Kevin Federline's. The bottom line is a man who averaged nearly 20 and 10 in '08-'09 is being reduced to a role player by his team. If the Rockets intend to barely use Yao, it's time to consider trading him.

A (Du)Rant on the FIBA Team

Yes, the U.S. won for the first time since 1994, but let me be blunt: This FIBA squad was feeble. Too young, leader-less and lacking centers and shooters; the flaws were obvious. Evaluating the ramshackle roster, expectations and enthusiasm were diminished. However, to most countries, this event is more significant than the Olympics because more teams participate, so the rest of the world would still view the U.S. bowing out as a big deal.

Letting Rajon Rondo, who is the best rebounder at his position in the league and probably would've been the second-best of this bunch, walk away (which he did so he wouldn't have to be officially cut), was a mistake. The argument for his dismissal was that he can be difficult to coach. I guess Coach K wasn't willing to deal with a player who doesn't follow his every order, who he doesn't have complete control over at all times. There's a difference between a player who's undisciplined and one who's stubborn; I believe Rondo is the latter, not the former. Another head-scratching move was relying on Lamar Odom, one of the most frustratingly inconsistent players in the league during his career, to be productive and provide leadership when he's always shied away from it, was a huge gamble. Surprisingly, it worked out, but it wasn't Odom or Chauncey Billips who set the example the rest of the group followed.

If it wasn't for the constant heroics of Kevin Durant, this tournament would've ended quickly and disgracefully for the U.S. Durant had to be historically excellent and nearly perfect in every outing for this team to take the trophy. Thanks to his scorching shooting, especially from long-range, he scored more points in the tournament and in a single game than any American ever has. It was unreasonable to expect that of a 21-year-old, yet Durant delivered. Simply put, he was better than everyone. He was better than we imagined. He was better than we deserved.

See If Eye Care

L.A. Clippers rookie Al-Farouq Aminu, who sported some goofy glasses during the draft, might have been mocked for his cosmetic choice (the lenses were non-prescription), but now he's making money off of it. Aminu has agreed to an endorsement deal with Geek Eyewear. We bet Horace Grant is ticked he didn't think of this 15 years ago. Playing for Clippers, Aminu would be wise to wear a pair of rose-colored glasses this season.

Warriors Pony(tail) Up for Amundson

Believe it or not, amidst all the changes of address for LeBron, Amare, Bosh and Boozer, free-agent forward Louis Amundson got lost in the shuffle. No more. Golden State inked the golden-haired one, who was part of an effective rotation in Phoenix last season. The Suns showed him the door after signing Hakim Warrick and trading for Hedo Turkoglu. Amudson's stats aren't gaudy, but as Jay-Z once said, "You can't knock the hustle."

Could Iverson Crossover to China?

Gary Moore, Allen Iverson's personal manager (not to be confused with his agent, Leon Rose, who would actually handle this kind of move), says the star is considering taking the road recently traveled by Stephon Marbury and hooping it up in China, since no NBA teams have invited him to camp yet. Due to his small stature and fearless, frenetic play, Iverson has always been a crowd favorite and the NBA is huge in China, so this could be a savvy move, earning Iverson millions more dollars and, potentially, millions of new fans. It would also be ironic that a man who's never wanted to conform could find happiness in a land where authoritarianism rules. If a team signs him, they'll probably require him to practice and that hasn't always sat well with him. We hope it happens because you can't spell "Shanghai" without 'ai.'

T-Wolves Plan to Suck This Season

The Minnesota Timberwolves, the team of 10,000 point guards in the land of 10,000 lakes, took out a full-page ad in the Star-Tribune Monday acknowledging that any remaining fans will be in for a long and painful season, asking and then answering the question, "So will we challenge for an NBA championship this year? Not likely." At least they're supporting the local paper; they should consider placing another ad in the "Personals" section: single, mixed race team seeks supporters.
But just how unlikely is it? About as unlikely as "Donnie" Darko Milicic, who they inexplicably signed to a four-year, $20 mill. deal this off-season, becoming the league MVP. Sometimes, honesty isn't the best policy.